Below is a diary of contact. This is diary of what happened at each contact session and other related events:-
It is important to maintain such a record so that you can refer to it in court. Also, because of its open style it is like a breath of fresh air to the judge in the case. It will actually give a more realistic idea of events than a set of boring legal documents and professional reports. Professional reports, such as from CAFCASS, because of the time restraints will only be a snapshot of the case.
If you have difficulty speaking in court the diary of contact will actually present a lot of your case for you. It will also give an understanding to the judge as to why you are making the applications that you are making.
IN THE LIVERPOOL HIGH COURT CASE NO: LV07P0XXXX
K Punch Applicant
H Judy Respondent
Diary of contact from 9 November to 16 April 2008 dated 16.04.08
9 November 2005
In L’s writing “I went to new Brightin whith my Dad. But first I went to the see Side cafe. then i went to the arcakade”. I was proud of my daughter’s writing ability.
I picked up L from school a little early 3.12. L was waiting. straightforward – no problems. When we arrived at New Brighton, I noticed L was scratching her hair. I checked her hair – she had head lice.
Timed my leaving from New Brighton incorrectly. I ran a little late. I rang the contact centre to state I am on the way at 6.30. Arrive at 6.37 pm
16 November 2005
Went again to sea side cafe to eat. Went to Arcade. L tried and I tried to win a grab cuddly toy prize. No luck. Went to Tesco because L said she needed a scarf, hat and gloves set. It was coming to winter I suppose. When we get there , there is a new clothes section upstairs. We ride on the escalator. Again I notice L has head lice. We return to the contact centre on time.
23 November 2005
Car problem. Come up by train. NYAS take my passport. Take taxi to school at 3.15. Had a chat with Mr. S(headteacher). He advised me that L had been vomiting. I mentioned that L had head lice. He assured me it was a Wirral wide epidemic and that 75% of the school had head lice. I wasn’t impressed. L and I returned to Birkenhead. I carried her to a couple of shops. She was lethargic. Then we went to the Chinese buffet in Conway Street. L was poorly the whole time and I cuddled her in my arms. She had no appetite. Returned at 6.35. I carried her all the way from Conway Street to the contact centre. I think she fell asleep.
30 November 2005
L said she needed shoes. She showed me her shoes which were scuffed. We went to shoemarket where L picked a pair of trainers. I made sure she tried them on and walked in them before I bought them.
We then went to Woolworths where I bought L a learning computer. We then went to the Thai restaurant in Argyle St. We had hot chocolate. The hot chocolate was too hot for L so she waited until it cooled down. We arrive at the contact centre 5 minutes late 6.35.
Mother was there with L’s half sister A. Mother tried to interrogate me about A’s father. I didn’t feel comfortable talking to Mother. I was leaving myself open to false allegations so I quickly ended the conversation and went inside.
6 December 2005 onwards
Contact as normal during this period but I have lost a couple of the notebooks of the details of contact.
19 July 2006
Started journey at 6.00 am
Lots of traffic on M6
Arrive at contact centre 10.20.
L not there.
Mother drops off L at 11.10 am
Took L to Southport. Went to funfair. Enjoyed rides together. Had our dinner in an old fashioned English cafe. L wanted to buy a pink, child-sized armchair. I bought it for her.
Queue in the discount shop was lengthy. Traffic on Southport to Liverpool road. I phone ahead to say I was stuck in traffic. Arrive late at 6.30. Mother’s boyfriend giving me very bad glances and making threats with his fist. I request J H(centre manager) ban Mother’s boyfriend from contact.
J H refuses because he is outside the contact centre and he has no jurisdiction.
26 July 2006
Started at 6.15am Arrive at contact centre 10.10 am.
L arrives at the contact centre at 10.15. Took L for breakfast in local cafe. Drove to Llandudno. We bought a kite and played on the beach with the kite. We went after on a chair lift over the Great Orme. After that we returned to beach and made sandcastles. L was very reluctant to leave beach. Returned to contact centre at 6.00pm. Mother’s taxi is parked next to the door of the contact centre up a path.
Mother’s boyfriend jumped out of the car as I was leading L into the contact centre. I was verbally abused and threatened with violence by Mother’s partner in front of L. I tell him I will defend myself and L’s safety. I tell the staff in the contact centre it is not right that he should be allowed to come to the contact centre and threaten me all the time. I state I will defend myself.
2 August 2006
Arrived at contact centre 10am. Mother drops off L at 10.30am. The day is cold and wet. L has a skimpy top on. I go to the shops and buy L a coat. We then drive to New Brighton. L climbs to top of climbing wall in fun centre. Returned L at 6.00 pm. Mother arrives at 6.20pm. Contact centre admonish Mother over lateness.
9 August 2006
Arrived at 10.00am. L already there! I wait for Mother and her boyfriend to leave the area.
L extremely lethargic. Drove to Llandudno. L slept in the car all the way there. I was very concerned. However L picked up and slowly became excited and was playing on the beach. After that, we sat on the pavement and watched the Punch & Judy show. After we went on the pier. We returned to contact centre at 6.00pm. Again Mother’s boyfriend is parked across the side of the contact centre. He gave me threatening looks with finger pointing and hand gestures as I entered the contact centre.
16 August 2006
Arrived 10.40am after big road accident on M6 by Stafford. L hands me a list of purchases. J H explains Mother Hodgson made this list for me to buy. I bought L’s school uniform by shopping with L to Primark, Adams, Woolworth, Marks & Spencer’s and Tesco found all of the uniform except for burgundy cardigan.
We then drove to New Brighton and ate lunch at the seaside cafe. We then enjoyed the rides togther at the funfair. We came back to Seacombe and went to the spaceport. Not sure if L understood all the science stuff in there. L records a DVD. We went to Matalan to see if we could buy the cardigan in there. No luck. We get back to contact centre at 6pm. Mother’s boyfriend still parked across the side of NYAS front door. Still menacing me. I march straight past into the contact centre with L. I hug and kiss L and try to reassure her.
23 August 2006
Arrived on time. Went to Birkenhead market to buy L’s cardigan. They had burgundy cardigan’s but not in L’s size. I ordered for next week and pay for it.
We bought sandwiches and drove to Llandudno. L rode on the donkey. After she came back she wanted another ride. I explained there were other children waiting. She got off. I watched as the other children rode when they came back L had another go. We ate at a restaurant. Went to beach. We returned at 6.00. Mother not there. They arrive at 6.10. No problems. I am inside. I hug and kiss L.
30 August 2006
Arrived at 9.55am. Waited. At 10.10 I request the staff to ring Mother. Mother states that L is sick. And complains that the staff are accusing her of lying. Mother arrives with L at 10.40am. L does seem quiet, but she actually looks well. I rush to Birkenhead market to collect L’s cardigan. It’s not there. They state we can order it for tomorrow. I state I will be in London tomorrow. I complain. I asked them if they could deliver it to L’s school. They said yes. I took L to spaceport to collect DVD. Staff inside spaceport that the DVD had been deleted. We drive to New Brighton seaside cafe and have lunch. Then we drive to Southport we go to beach and pier. There is an old fashioned old penny arcade. L has a lot of fun. We ride on the pier tram. We arrive back at 6pm. Mother not there so we rush into the contact centre. Mother arrives at 6.15. I hug and kiss L. L leaves.
6 September 2006
Picked up L from school at 3.15.
L is wearing her new cardigan. She said that the teacher gave it to her.
I took L to Platters restaurant in Birkenhead by taxi. Took L to park. We played on the swings. We then collected conkers which weren’t quite ripe. Returned L at 6.30. Mother arrives at 6.35. I hug L and she leaves.
13 September 2006
Picked L up from school at 3.15. Took L to Birkenhead by taxi. Went to cafe. We ate sandwiches. L had juice I had a pot of tea. We went shopping. On the way to the contact centre we were early. we found a tennis ball and we played catch near the contact centre. Returned L at 6.30.
20 September 2006
Went to school at 3.15. Waited ten minutes, until staff realised she was at the other gate for the mother. I took L to Birkenhead Park. I give L sandwiches to eat which I had bought before contact. We played on all the playground facilities. Swings, see-saw, roundabout, climbing frame. We explored the park via the path that goes through the park. We came across some ducks sitting by the lake. L chases them into the water. We collected a lot of conkers. L counted them all. It came to 51 conkers. We walked back to centre slowly. I carried her as she got tired. Arrived at 6.30. Mother arrives 6.45. I hug and kiss L.
27 September 2006
Went to Liverpool to Chinese buffet restaurant in Liverpool near Lime St. L enjoyed using the ticket machine to buy the tickets for our journey with the money I gave to her. She was surprised that there were 4 tickets. I explained we both have tickets to go and to come back.
We went shopping in Liverpool. We returned by train to Hamilton square at 6.20. L wanted to get a taxi from there to contact centre. I told her not to be lazy. It’s only 200 yards. 6.30 at contact centre
4 October 2006
Picked up L at 3.15.
L was viewing a show for the children, an entertainer. I explained that I had a taxi waiting to the teacher and she fetched L before the very end. We went to Victoria park had a good time on swings. Got very tired pushing L. We returned by taxi to contact 6.30
11 October 2006
Pick L up at 3.15. Teacher advises me to come at 3.00 next week to have a parent teacher’s meeting the following. I take her shopping because she wanted a diary for school. After we go to Thai restaurant. I order King prawn and vegetable soup for her. She eats all the king prawns and leaves the soup. Contact centre at 6.30.
18 October 2006
Go to school at 3.00pm. Talk with teacher. L good at reading, writing and spelling. L mediocre at maths. Teacher asks me how I could improve her low attendance rate. I explain I have no power to improve L’s attendance. I am dismayed. L lives 200 yards from school. We go back to Birkenhead by bus. We eat our tea in the Chinese buffet bar in Conway Street. We go to WHSmiths. L buys a ‘Horrid Henry’ book. I read a little of the book and make up my own Horrid Henry story for L which she listens to with great attention. I include L in the story. L is known as Loopy L in the story. The story is about Horrid Henry and all is friends who visit the restaurant. Back at 6.30.
25 October 2006
I am driving to station. Mobile rings. 10.30am. Contact centre asks where are you? I am in my car. They ask what time I arrive. About 2.00. They explain it’s half term.
1 November 2006
I go to the school at 3.10. I wait. L comes hesitatingly. I open my arms and she gives me a big hug, as big as a little one could anyway. I carry her to the taxi. She is very clingy and won’t let go of me. Perhaps she has been missing me. We go shopping and go to eat in Platters. She buys a multi colour lighted torch in the shape of a dinosaur, and she buys a money box. We go to the Thai restaurant near the contact centre and have drinking chocolate while we play with the dinosaur and moneybox. I give her all my loose change for the moneybox. We arrive at the contact centre at 6.25. Mother arrives at 6.45. I give L a good hug and kiss and say goodbye.
8 November 2006
Pick up L at 3.15. Quickly rushed to platters cafe/restaurant and we had our dinner. We then quickly rushed to the cinema. The feature length cartoon ‘open season’ is about to start after 5 minutes. We buy a big box of popcorn. And we go in. We shared the popcorn and enjoyed the film. We then go straight to contact centre. arrive at 6.25. Mother is late again 6.45.
15 November 2006
Bought a mobile phone for L so that we can have telephone contact. Bought some sandwiches. I took L to space port and L ate a sandwich on the way. L then made another recording on a DVD of herself telling the space news. I gave L the mobile phone. On the way out we asked for the DVD, they said it wouldn’t be ready for an hour. They suggested coming back tomorrow. I state I did that last time and the DVD was deleted. We waited and half an hour later it was ready. We then went to the Thai restaurant near the contact centre. L had prawn soup again. We arrive at centre 6.30. Mother arrives at 6.40
22 Nov 2006
Again, contact as normal during the following period. But no details of contact because I have mislaid a couple of notebooks.
21 February 2007
I arrive at contact centre at 9.55. L arrives at 10.50. I take L to New Brighton. She plays in the fairground. She enjoys the rides. We go into adventureland. She does rock climbing. After that we return to Birkenhead and see the film charlotte’s web. This was a very nice children’s film. We run to contact centre. We arrive 5 minutes late 6.05 along with Mother.
28 February 2007
9.00 pm Contact centre ring and state that according to Mother L has fever and is not going to school that day.
7 March 2007
Arrive at 3.15 at school. Take L to Chinese buffet on Conway street. L has a great appetite she eats a great variety of foods. And she eats some fruit. We go shopping. I buy for L an MP3 player and a Hannah Montana CD. We go to Wimpey’s in Birkenhead and check out how to operate the MP3 player. No luck because the battery needs charging. Return at 6.30
14 March 2007
J H rings and requests I drop off L at 6.00pm because there is no staff available for 6.30pm drop off. I don’t accede to his request. J says contact will have to take place outside the contact centre. At 6.25 on my way to the centre, a street away from the centre a taxi pulls up alongside me and L. It is Mother and her boyfriend. Collection on Argyle Street near the Thai restaurant. I think, “this is leaving me exposed to false allegations.”
15 March 2007
I ring for my passport.
I receive my passport.
21 March 2007
I handover my passport. I exercise contact. I ring to say I will handover L from the Thai Restaurant on Argyle Street. Handover from Thai restaurant. I stay in restaurant to avoid confrontation. No passport. No Nyas
28 March 2007
receive passport by post. L says her mother is buying her a lap top. L really wants this. I promise L if her mother doesn’t buy it for her I will buy her a computer instead.
4 April 2007
My birthday. I ask L if she receives a laptop. The answer is no. She got a speak and spell toy computer.
11 April 2007
I ask contact centre to mind L’s computer because I don’t want to carry it everywhere during contact. We go to the contact centre where I give L the computer for her birthday (2nd April). She is happy. I collect my passport
18 April 2007
Contact as normal. Handover from restaurant. Boyfriend giving me nasty looks. I stay inside to avoid confrontation and guarantee witnesses. No NYAS No passport.
20 April 2007
Ring Nyas over passport. However passport not sent.
25 April 2007
I go straight to school because NYAS have my passport. School refuses to hand L over because NYAS don’t ring. School rings NYAS to confirm passport. Contact okay.
Handover from restaurant. No NYAS, no passport.
26 April 2007
I ring for my passport. I receive my passport 28 April
2 May 2007
I go straight to school. I get there 5 minutes early so that they can ring NYAS. Contact as normal.
Handover from Thai restaurant. No Passport. I stop asking NYAS to post my passport.
9 May 2007
I do the same this week. Again No NYAS. No passport.
10 May 2007
I try to open high interest savings account. I require passport as proof of I.D.
16 May 2007
Same again. No Nyas for return contact.
23 May 2007
I agree with Nyas to keep my passport. I am afraid of it getting lost in the post.
30 May 2007
No passport. No Nyas. Handover at Thai restaurant. Mother & boyfriend come in a black hackney taxi. L doesn’t realise her mother is there. I tell her there on the side of the restaurant. I hug her and she goes out.
6 June 2007
No Passport. No Nyas. Handover at Thai restaurant.
13 June 2007
No passport. No Nyas. Handover at Thai restaurant.
20 June 2007
No passport. No Nyas. Handover at Thai restaurant.
27 June 2007
No passport. No Nyas. Handover at Thai restaurant.
4 July 2007
No passport. No Nyas. Handover at Thai restaurant.
11 July 2007
I pick up L from school at 3.15. I take L to the Chinese buffet bar where we eat. Then we go to the park. We go to the Thai restaurant at 6.30. We drink hot chocolate while we wait. The mother arrives at 6.45. I stay in the restaurant and make no contact with the mother. The boyfriend is giving me nasty looks through the window, I ignore him. I go home. No Nyas. I can’t collect my passport.
18 July 2007
I pick up L from the school at 3.15. I take her to a restaurant to eat and we build origami houses. We have a good time in Birkenhead Town centre. I return her to the Thai restaurant at 6.25. I wait until 6.40. The mother arrives with her boyfriend. I make a request to take L to Hull to see her Grandmother’s sister who has just arrived from Cyprus and to see her uncle and cousins who live in Hull. L’s great Auntie had never seen L all her life and would dearly have liked to see her. The mother says she will think about it. The boyfriend is giving me nasty looks. I ignore him. I go home. I can’t collect my passport – No Nyas.
25 July 2007
I go to the contact centre at 10am. No L
I wait. The contact centre ring the mother at 10.15. The mother says she will be there in half an hour and that she is suffering from depression.
11.15 The mother arrives at the contact centre and drops L off. She has a very disturbed demeanour. I assumed that she didn’t agree to me taking L to Hull. L looks tired. L quickly picks up though. I take L to New Brighton to the funfair and indoor play centre. She thoroughly enjoys herself. Nyas ring and ask whether I was taking L to Hull. I state no I am in New Brighton. Then we go to West Kirby beach where we build sand castles. L gets very dirty with sand and muddy shoes.
I take L to the Morrison’s supermarket. She goes into the toilet and spends about half an hour in there. I ask her why she was so late. She explains that she was trying to clean her shoes. I said you will make us late.
I drive back to the Thai restaurant at 6.20. The mother and her boyfriend are not there. I wait twenty minutes. L suggest her mother might be at the contact centre. I drive up. She is there waiting in her boyfriend’s car. When I pull up the boyfriend rushes up to my car. He opens the passenger door and starts threatening and hurling abuse at me. I opened my car door and got out of the car. I took L out of my side of the car and took her to the mother. I shielded L and guided her to the mother waiting in the taxi. I hand her over. L is crying. The boyfriend is threatening all the time and when L was safely with the mother I start to defend myself. I ask him not to threaten me in front of L. I explain you shouldn’t even be here. This is a private matter between me, L and the mother. He tried to provoke me by stating that I was a wife batterer and had put Mother Hodgson in hospital and that he would take great pleasure in beating a wife batterer up. I told him Mother is a compulsive liar. He then said to Mother Hodgson, you tell him what you told me. She was quiet. She just blurted out if I want I can stop you seeing your daughter anytime. I told her that you are forcing me to go back to court. I was upset for L who was crying in the back of the Taxi.
28 July 2007
I report the threats of violence to the police in Birkenhead by telephone.
1561 0f 28th July Birkenhead police
reference number P3375626.
1 August 2007
I go to court at 9am in Vernon street to make my application. The court states we are not open until 10am. I go to the contact centre.
I got to contact centre at 10 am
At 10.15 contact centre ring mother. Mother refuses contact. They ask mother why. The mother starts making lots of incoherent allegations. She states she refuses to go back to court.
J H explains they are short staffed.
At 11am I go to the court collect the forms and file my application at about 1pm.
8 August 2007
I got to contact centre at 10 am. No L
At 10.15 contact centre ring mother. Mother refuses contact
I go to Birkenhead police station and make a statement.
15 August 2007
I got to contact centre at 10 am. No L
At 10.15 contact centre ring mother. Mother refuses contact
22 August 2007
I go to contact centre at 10am. No L
At 10.15 The contact centre ring mother. Mother refuses to bring L.
NO CONTACT. I forget to collect my passport.
29 August 2007
I go to contact centre at 10 am. No L
Mother doesn’t turn up. J H rings at 10.15 to mother. Mother is adamant. She states,” I will not bring L I have depression.” After 15 minutes J H rings again and offers to drive up personally to the house collect L and at the end to return L after contact. Mother again refuses and swears at J H. J H states, “I have not had her swear at me personally before!”. I just remark, “It was commonplace when we lived together.” I collect my passport and go home.
On the way home I phone NYAS to ask if there is school the next week. They advise no the school term doesn’t start until Thursday 6 September.
No contact on advice of NYAS that the school was closed.
12 September 2007
Go to Liverpool. Deposit my passport at NYAS. Inform J H of court day 25/09/07.
Go to school to collect L.
School secretary states I cannot give L to you Mr. Christophorou. The mother has stopped your contact.
I advise the school there is a court order from Justice Hedley and this is my daughter and I collect my daughter as per the court order. I requested they ring NYAS. NYAS advise them that they should ring the mother. They ring the mother. Mother informs the school, I am the resident parent and he is not allowed to take L.
The school says we cannot allow you to take L out of the school.
NYAS ring me and state it is not in the best interest of L to take her out of the school.
I state there is a court order. I am allowed to take my daughter out of the school. It is my right and L’s right. J H states I will take legal advice. After they bring L to the office where I was sat.
J H rings back and says, we cannot legally stop you taking L out of the school but we would take a dim view and might report unfavourably to the court. You are creating difficulties for yourself.
The school informs me L has been in school 8 days now. I queried this. They were quite certain.
I spent half an hour with my daughter. By this time the mother had rushed to the school. And was outside the headmaster’s office. L immediately became agitated. Said sorry I have to go dad. I said let me have one last hug and kiss. We hugged and both became very emotional. It was very difficult to let L go. Then L left. I was very upset. I went back to the contact centre to collect my passport. They were closed no staff were there. I rang at 4.45 no answer. I rang at 5.00 no answer. I ring NYAS HQ answer machine states closed at 5.00 pm. I left for home. No Passport.
MINIMAL CONTACT under horrendous circumstances.
18 September 2007
Ring the school to confirm contact is okay.
Ring Nyas to try and confirm. J H is off with family problems.
19 September 2007 I Go for contact. I go to contact centre to speak to J not there.
I arrive at school 3.10. Secretary checks register. She states L hasn’t been in all week. She shows me the attendance. L is about 50% attendance.
I leave and return to Nyas House. I collect my passport. I inform Nyas officer Catherine that J H is in court on 25th September 2007. I leave for London.
25 September 2007 court before Justice Hedley. Mothers non attendance. Penal notice attached for enforcement of contact.
26 September 2007
No contact. The penal notice hasn’t been served on mother yet. So I don’t go for contact.
2 October 2007
After several attempts at service, the process server serves the court order of Justice Hedley of 25th September onto Mrs. Hodgson of (address of mother). They confirm this to me.
3 October 2007
I go to collect L from School at 3.15. No problem. I leave the school and as I am heading to my taxi the mother is making her way down St Peter’s Way and starts shouting abuse at me. I get into the taxi and we drive off avoiding the mother. L is clearly upset by the mother’s abuse and anger. We go to Birkenhead and I take L for something to eat. L starts crying and then hides her face behind a piece of paper. I take her on my lap and console her. She cheers up and I take her to buy her some roller skate shoes. We have a good time roller skating and building paper planes in the Pyramids shopping centre. We head towards the Thai restaurant on Argyle Street at 6:15 on the road towards the restaurant we are accosted by the mother and her boyfriend. Threats of violence and verbal abuse are made against me by both the mother and her boyfriend in L’s presence. L is dragged by the arm and pushed into the back of the taxi. L is deeply upset.
4 October 2007
I make a non molestation application supported by an affidavit for my and L’s protection. I wait from 10.00am to 3.00pm. I don’t get a hearing. I am advised I can’t get a hearing because it is in the high court. I am told to come back the next morning.
5 October 2007
I go back to court at 10am to get a hearing. I am advised to come back at 1am. The case is to be referred to Mr. Justice Ryder to make a decision to grant a hearing. The Listings Clerk advises I make an application for committal proceedings. Clerk states that I have a hearing date for Tuesday at 10.30am before DJ Hayworth to hear the non molestation application. Also the hearing before Justice Hedley has been brought forward to 15 November at 10.30am. The mother is to be served notice by a bailiff. I return home exhausted.
I read my mail. I read the affidavit of service of 2nd October confirming the telephone conversation of the 2nd October. L sends me a text message at 9.25am. I am asleep. I reply at 12.19pm.
9 October 2007
Court at 10.30 for non molestation directions hearing. Mother brings boyfriend to court (Mr. Roberts). Mother signs undertaking. I reluctantly sign undertaking in order to facilitate protection for contact the next day. I am advised proceeding with Non-molestation hearings would not happen quickly enough to afford me protection during contact over the next few weeks.
10 October 2007
Picked up L at 3.15 from school. L happy to see me. We go directly to Birkenhead park. We play on new rides in park and feed the geese. We then go blackberry picking. L is very happy. L says she needs new shoes for school and trainers for p.e. We buy them. We then go to Chinese restaurant. L eats a record number of mussels. We then go into Thai restaurant at 6.20. We wait. At 6.45 I ring FNF friend for advice because mother hadn’t turned up. However, mother arrives outside at 6.55. No boyfriend.
17 October 2007
Picked up L from school. Take L to park. We go to Thai restaurant and eat a meal there and wait for mother. Mother arrives 6.35pm outside. No boyfriend.
24 October 2007
Arrive at 10am at NYAS house. NYAS officer(Catherine) not expecting me. I wait. Mother doesn’t arrive. I ask NYAS officer to ring mother in case she has gone to Thai restaurant by mistake. Mother confirms to NYAS that she waited there half an hour and refuses to come to contact centre. Mother states she is on the way to her solicitors. NYAS contact mother’s solicitors and NYAS relay that contact is to take place at NYAS house. Mother arrives at 11.10am. I take L to doctor to make enquiries about allergies and present medication. We go to New Brighton and have a good time at the fair rides and adventure land. We eat fish & chips. We go to car wash, which L enjoys being inside the car. We go to cinema and watch ‘Nancy Drew’. Film finishes at 5.50am. We rush to Thai restaurant and go inside. Mother arrives at 6.00pm outside. L leaves with mother.
29 October 2007
L texts me to cancel contact on 31.10.07 for Halloween party. I tell her I have already bought my tickets and can’t cancel. I text L back and state “I can go with her to Halloween party”. L texts back that it is for children only – no adults.
31 October 2007
I pick up L at 3.15. I take her to new Chinese buffet in Birkenhead. We eat. L has head lice. L tells me the Halloween party was in Moreton and her mother was to take her. We went shopping. L ate well today. Mother collected her outside Thai restaurant at 6.30.
7 November 2007
Pick L up at 3.15. We eat. I buy new coat for L because she has run out of coats. L eats well today. L still has head lice. We hunt everywhere for stickers and a sticker book. No luck. Handover at Thai restaurant at 6.30. Mother outside. After L leaves, one of the Thai waitresses tells me her story about her son in Norway that she can only see for two weeks a year – her son stays with his father. She was deported and couldn’t take her son with her. I felt very upset for her.
14 November 2007
Pick up L at 3.15. L is wearing her new coat. She says she’s like an Eskimo. We go to pyramids shopping centre and build origami figures in the seating area. We do this until 5pm, when we go to Chinese buffet so that L can eat her mussels. L eats well. We have an eating race. I let L win. L laughs and giggles. We go to the Thai restaurant at 6.25. We wait until 6.40 when the mother collects L outside. I stay in Liverpool on advice of court officials of directions hearing of 16 November 2007
16 November 2007
Court – directions hearing. Mother present. NYAS not present.
21 November 2007
Pick up L at 3.20. L was waiting at previous entrance. School state, ’it is okay for you to pick up L where all other parents collect their children. Mother has no reason to be at the school on Wednesday. We buy clothes for L because she says she will go to a party the following day. We play origami again. L shows me some more models that she has learned to make. I also buy her “bratz” sticker book and stickers. We eat at the Chinese buffet. L only manages 6 mussels this time but also eats 5 king prawns. We go to Thai restaurant. Mother is 5 minutes late.
28 November 2007
Pick up L at 3.15. We go to cinema. ‘Ratatouille’ cartoon film starts at 4.30. We go to restaurant and eat. Then we go and watch film. Film finishes at 6.20. We go to drop off point. Mother comes at 6.35.
5 December 2007
Pick up L at 3.15. We go to WHSMITHS to buy stickers for her ‘Bratz’ sticker book. I tell L that I bought the high school musical sticker book but forgot to bring it. She was very excited because she had been looking for it for 4 weeks and couldn’t find it. We went to the new coffee shop and had drinking chocolate while L put her stickers in her book. She was kicking her legs up and down in excitement when she asked me would I bring it next week. Then we went to Argos and I told her to make a list of at least 8 possible things you would like for Christmas. I told her I will buy one and it will be a surprise.
We then went to eat in Buffet88 and we made up a story on the laptop together.
Mother picked her up at 6.40
8 December 2007
L reminds me to bring her sticker book to the school play by text message.
11 December 2007
School nativity play. I arrive at 7pm and go sit in the audience of parents. I wait. First performance by infants. Second performance by juniors. L comes on as a dancing girl. I think L might be good for ballet. She looks for me in audience. I start waving and she spots me and smiles. At 9pm it finishes and L comes to me and I hand her the sticker book. Then L goes to her mum and they leave. No incident at all. I wait 5 minutes then leave.
12 December 2007
Pick her up at 3.15. We go shopping for a female father Christmas outfit for her. We don’t find it so I buy a Christmas fairy costume instead. It is very cold. We go to the Chinese buffet. L again eats mussels. Eight this time. We finish the story of the strange toy then make up a new story of the baby unicorn. L updates her Christmas list. The waitress gives L a helium balloon. She lets it go outside and it flies up and over the buildings. Mother picks L up outside the Thai restaurant at 6.30.
19 December 2007
No contact due to my car accident on the 17th December.
22 December 2007
Text from L. She is concerned about my health. I reassure her.
26 December 2007
No contact. Still bed ridden.
5 January 2007
L text message asking me to buy new bed for her and A.
9 January 2007
We go to bed shop and I buy metal bunk bed for L. Mother to collect the following day.
I go with L to buy her belated Christmas present but shop is sold out.
16 January 2007
We go back to shop and buy her Christmas present, a Goodmans Karaoke machine.
We eat at the Chinese buffet restaurant. We draw pictures together and L asks me to set her some sums to do.
L hand’s me thirty pounds to buy a pink mobile – off her mum she says. Went to Argos to buy L’s phone. They were sold out. Tried a few places.
Went to phone shop and bought L her phone. Mother’s present though I paid forty pounds to it and mother only thirty.
L says her mobile is faulty. I ask her to bring it next time and I will get it repaired.
came up by car. Car broke down on motorway. Left car in Stoke. Got lift into liverpool.
New Brighton by bus. L met her friend there. Went on ferry to Liverpool and came back to Birkenhead. Went to playground by NYAS house. L had a very good day. She said it was her best ever day in her life.
Took new battery and started car from Stoke
Met NYAS officer at NYAS house for interview at 2.00. Finished at 3.00pm. Rushed to school by car about 5 minutes late. Took L to phone shop, who stated her mobile wasn’t faulty and reset the memory card. We went to platters. L wanted lasagne. They didn’t have any so we both had cheese omelettes. Go to Spaceport. L recorded herself telling space news. Took home DVD. Played in spaceport funhouse. L played with keycode for car radio.
Picked L up. Met by NYAS officer by school gate. L wanted to go to the cinema. However the NYAS officer wanted us to go somewhere where we could be observed. NYAS officer took us in her car to the park. L was wary of the NYAS officer. L enjoyed herself. Bit cold, but L didn’t notice because she ran round with lots of energy. L asked me why was the NYAS officer with us. I explained she was here to see how we get on. NYAS dropped us off at Birkenhead market. We went Platters where L ate Lasagne while we made origami figures.
Picked up L. Returned her faulty mobile to shop. We then went to eat in platters. We then went shopping for L’s school shoes and swimming costume, which she had lost. We went to Thai restaurant and waited for Tip.
Went to pick up L from school. L was rushing out of school. She had forgotten it was wednesday. She got into the taxi and we went to the cinema. We watched a film while eating popcorn. We then went to the chinese buffet to eat. We played a spy hide and seek game with little notes that I hid. We went to Thai restaurant and waited. Mother arrived 20 minutes late.
Picked up L from school. We went to eat at Platters. L didn’t like the film on the cinema, so we bought a football and instead played football in the cinema forecourt. Mother was early and waiting for us. She handed a letter to L who handed it to me.
Picked up L from contact centre at 10.00. We travelled on the ferry to seacombe, then got the bus to New Brighton. We went on all the rides. L’s favourite ride was the miami ride. She didn’t like the bumper cars because it bumps too much. We ate in the Seaside cafe. Afterwards we got the ferry back to seacombe. Spaceport was close so L played in the space adventureland instead. We got the ferry back to Hamilton square. We arrived 10 minutes late to the drop off point.
L’s birthday. I arrive at ten. Nyas tell me Mother is running 20 minutes late. L is dropped off at 10.30. We go to Argos to buy L’s present a desk and chair. They wouldn’t hold it for Tip to collect the next day so we left. We went to Liverpool. We couldn’t find a suitable desk and chair so we went to New brighton by train. Michael at the New Brighton fish&chip shop gave L £5. We came back to Birkenhead afterwards. We went back to Argos and asked if they would deliver the desk and chair. They said they would. I gave L £5 as well. We arrive at the Thai restaurant at 5.50. Tip arrived 6.00.
L wants to buy raffle tickets to sell. So I buy her some raffle tickets. She then asks me what prizes she should give out. I ask her about her old mobile phones. She would rather keep them. We then go shopping around. We buy a super large toblerone for one pound, a folding garden chair for five pounds and a nice pink mobile phone for ten pounds. I advise L to sell the tickets you have to knock on all your neighbours doors and take all the prizes with you to show what to win.
L advises me that she has sold over seven pounds worth of tickets but hasn’t finished yet. I encourage her to carry on until all the tickets are sold. We go to Space port in Seacombe. L doesn’t want to go to the planetarium show because it is boring and says “you always fall asleep in there.” We go anyway and they had a different much more interesting show about astronauts and their life in space. L really enjoyed it.
We ended up in the Thai restaurant at 6.00pm and ordered food. L rang her mum to say come 10 minutes later to finish off our food.
Day after court in Manchester. I am still in Liverpool at hotel. Nyas house ring to inform me not to come to Liverpool. Mother advises L is ill. I think mother is playing up because Nyas are to start visiting contact and overnight staying contact(with mother’s apparent agreement). I was disappointed. I think mother will settle down by next week.
Pick up L from school. L explained to me that she sold only half the lottery tickets but had made £22 pounds. A profit of £5. She wanted to do it again. We went to West Kirby. We bought a bucket and spade and went to the beach. L enjoyed herself very much. We built a big sandcastle with 4 towers joined by 4 walls and dug a moat round it. When I went to the Chinese restaurant, we waited outside. Mother pulled up with her boyfriend next to my car. I didn’t feel comfortable.
I bought a car to have in Liverpool shared with a friend. I pick L from school. 10 minutes late. Held up in traffic. We go to Victoria park. The park had been totally renovated. Large boulders and new swings and climbing frames. Excellent. L wanted to go on a swinging basket with other girls but was too shy. Eventually I walked over with L. The girls asked if she would like a go and L got on the swing. I pushed all of them together in the basket. They all laughed. We went into the Chinese restaurant and had our dinner. Mother came in and collected L.
Picked up L from school 10 minutes late. My friend had lost the key to my shared car. I got a taxi instead. L explained to me that she came top in her class in spelling. She had scored 39 out of 40. The teacher gave her a prize. I told her I was the top speller in my class when I was 10 as well and the teacher also had given me a prize. She said that she had taken after me. I took L to the restaurant, at about 25 past 6. Mother Hodgson was waiting there with her boyfriend Terence who was parked across the entrance of the restaurant. I couldn’t avoid them. I asked mother if her boyfriend could park away from the restaurant because I didn’t want any more trouble. She explained that she had a headache. She didn’t look in a very good mood at all.
I rang J T, if she could speak to Mother about it, because there is a penal notice preventing her bringing 3rd parties to the drop off point. J agrees to talk to her and to get back to me if Mother has any problems with it. Her role as a mediator is something that CAFCASS have never done.
Pick up car from friend’s house. Meet with J T at NYAS house. Talk about visiting and staying contact and any anxieties mother and L may have concerning staying contact. Mrs T informs me she had difficulties contacting Mother. I take L to buy toy finger nails with money her mother had given her. We buy them and then go to Hoylake. We go to a Greek restaurant so that L can try out authentic Greek food. Mrs T rings and informs me Mother will not bring boyfriend because she has split up with him. We arrive 5 minutes late. Mother comes out from restaurant and L tries to collect all her toy nails.
As previously informed by NYAS Guardian, L is to be picked up by J T at 9 oclock and brought down to Guildford for a couple of hours contact at my house. About 10.30 I receive a phone call from J T. She states that Mother opened the door and L was clinging to Mother. W was also at the door. L had a coat on. J T tried to speak to L. L wouldn’t face her and then ran upstairs and locked herself in her bedroom.
At 9.30 I received a phone call from J T advising me that L is not in school and that I would be wasting my time going to collect her from school. I decided to travel on anyway. When I reached Euston, I rang the school who informed me that L was in school. I rang J T and advised her of her mistake. J T stated that she would meet us in Birkenhead. I picked up L on time. We went shopping. L bought a lunchbox and a bubble blowing toy. We then met Mrs T at the buffet88 restaurant. I repeated to L in front of Mrs T that she has only one mum and one dad and that both of us will be in her life for the rest of her life and I would never keep her away from her mum. We then went to the park and played on the swings while L blew bubbles. Then on handover Mother spoke with me. She wanted an end to the court battles. She stated that if I could provide her with maintenance and moved to the Wirral that I could then have free access to L.
Collect L from school.
I wait outside Buffet88 for Mother. She comes over and we have a chat. We chat for 40 minutes. I have to leave for my train. She says she will ring me on her free weekend calls.
Mother rings me and we have a long chat about arrangements for L. Mother asks me to meet up on Tuesday when she picks L up from school.
I go to mother’s address and she says L is still in school in a dance class. She asks me to pick L up. I go to the school. The school immediately rings Mother up, who advises the school that she had sent me. The school state dance class doesn’t finish until 4.30 so I go back to Mothers house. We sit and talk over a cup of tea. At 4.25 I head back towards the school. L meets me halfway up the road and we walk back to Mother’s house. We then get a taxi to the Chinese restaurant in Birkenhead. We discuss things in general but not any specifics. After the meal we go to Mother’s friend’s house. While walking L comments that it feels strange that her mum and dad are both walking with her. Mother asks me what I want specifically. I just ask that L to travel between us freely. I also ask that we put my name on L’s birth certificate. I also ask Mother to come to Guildford for a few days with L. Mother states she is vehemently opposed to NYAS’s involvement and that we should be able to arrange things between us and that she is fed up of court proceedings. L takes me into the back garden where we play and L shows me her somersaults. Afterwards Mother asks me to write down my demands. I tell her that we should meet tomorrow.
I collect L as per contact and I ring Mother if she wanted to join us. She says she is busy and will meet later. L asks me to have her ears pierced. We go to the high street store Claire’s and L has her ears pierced. She dreaded it but said it didn’t hurt much, that it just tickled. We went to the Indian buffet in Birkenhead. We both agreed the food was awful. We then went shopping. I met Mother near the cinema plaza. I gave Mother £50 for maintenance. Mother stated that she had a headache and wasn’t in a mood to talk.
Collect L from school at 3.15. Ring Mother to see if she would join us. She says she is busy. L and I buy sandwiches and go to cinema to watch superhero. Film was banal but L loved it. We go shopping because L wants a paper punch. Mother rings up and we arrange to meet in the Greek restaurant in Borough Road. Mother brings her friend Jane and daughter A. I order for everyone as best I can based on what they prefer to eat. We share all the various foods. Most of it went down well. L ate everything except dolma which is rice and mincemeat mix wrapped in a vine leaf.
We meet up at Italian restaurant near Prenton Park. It is closed so we go to Clipper pub until 5.30 when restaurant opened. Food was nice. Everyone goes to toilet while me and Mother discuss things. Still nothing concrete. Mother is hostile to Guardian.
Court. We agree a schedule of visiting contact in Guildford with vague possibility of overnight staying contact. I am not sure of Mother’s sincerity, whether its based on fobbing off of NYAS. Mother accuses J T(Guardian) of aggressive behaviour towards her. Guardian shocked at such an allegation. Private meeting between Mother and Guardian arranged to lower the temperature. Mother admits to avoiding meeting Guardian.
No contact L apparently unwell.
Contact as normal
Meet L at school. L needs some clothes for end of year party, so we buy it. We go to cinema to watch journey to centre of the earth. L thought it might be a boring film, but she does enjoy it. She eats tacos. I eat popcorn. We meet Tip outside and go to restaurant together. We share taxi. I get dropped off at train station. I am late. Arrive home 2.30 am.
Meet Tip, L and A at Euston. I accompany them on underground and train from Waterloo to Guildford. We eat in a Thai restaurant. We then travel to hotel and book in. Then we go to my house. L and A go on go-kart round the block and annoy my neighbours. L laughs. They go back to hotel 9.30.
Pick them up at 11am and drive to Brighton. We go along pier. A and L go on rides. A scared of log chute. I go on with L. We play donkey derby and A wins a giant cuddly toy shark. I ride bucking bronco and last for 20 seconds. We go back towards car and eat in Greek restaurant on the way. L and A take KFC chickenburgers to restaurant. We drive back to my house. I give L’s grandmother’s chain and cross and tell her take very good care of it, which she promises. Tip borrows some videos to watch in hotel. We go into countryside near my house and feed some horses with grass. I take them back to hotel at 9.30.
Take them to train station. Train at 11.43 so they go shopping for presents for friends before train arrives.
At 9.25, I ring Tip to see what time she will bring L and where. She had just woken up and said would be there by 10.00. Tip and L meet me in Birkenhead shops at 11.00. L looks quiet and withdrawn. I think it might be just tiredness. I go with L to my friends house and we have breakfast. L is very clingy to me. It was very difficult to persuade L to eat. We get the train to West Kirby. We eat in Morrisons. L just eats chips. L shows me bruises and grazes on her arms and complains of chest pains. L is still withdrawn. I ask L how she obtained her injuries. She tells me she fell down the stairs. We go to the beach and play at sandcastles and digging a hole which fills up with water. At this point L’s mood picks up a bit and she enjoys herself. We then go to the marina. L gets some cockles and mussels and crabs. We then get on the train and go to Birkenhead. Handover near cinema at 6.00.
I pick up Mother, L and M (Mother’s granddaughter) from Waterloo. I take them to a different hotel than last time. This hotel is about 6 miles from my home. L is concerned that hotel is far from my house. We go to Indian restaurant near hotel. Afterwards, L wants to come to my house; however Mother whispers in L’s ear and L says she is tired and wants to sleep. Mother had been out all night the previous night and was tired. I stayed in hotel room until 10.30 singing nursery rhymes with the children to try and get them to sleep.
I go to their hotel after their breakfast about 11.00 am. We go shopping for some film for Mother’s camera. She doesn’t find any but buys strawberries instead. We then travel to Brighton eating them on the way. L buys a seashell jewelry box for her cross and chain. We go to beach where L and M go paddling. We travel to Marina. We park car then walk around. We then eat in pizza hut. We then head back to my home. On the way we stop off at a lay by to fill up the empty strawberry container with blackberries. We fill it right up about 2 kilos worth. We watch a 2 hour japanese cartoon. I make Greek coffee which me and Mother drink. I tell Mother’s fortune from the coffee grinds. We go back to hotel. I play with the children. At about 10.00pm Mother says she feels hungry so we go to an Indian takeaway to buy a Vindaloo. I have a Korma, while the children have chicken sweetcorn soup from the Chinese. We go back to hotel to eat our heavy supper.
I go back home at 11.30pm.
I collect them again after breakfast and bring them to my house. Again Mother has Greek coffee and I tell her her fortune again. The children play trampoline on my spare bed. Mother looks through my photos. We then go to Chessington world of adventures. It rains halfway through. No-one has any coats. Mother did not bring any down with her. I take them to Guildford station to collect the 7.32pm train. At Euston there is a problem with the date on the ticket. They phone me and I persuade the guard to let them through. At Euston the 9.15 train to Liverpool is cancelled. I tell Mother to head back to Guildford where I could collect them. They arrive back at 10.30pm. I take them all to my house. I set up a couple of spare mattresses in the living room with blankets,sheets and pillows. They sleep the night.
L is not well so I make her a hot lemonade drink from fresh squeezed lemon which she drinks. This picks her up. I take them the train station and buy a new set of tickets for the journey to Birkenhead. They get the 1.05pm train.
Arrive in Liverpool at 1.30pm. Arranged to meet near Lime Street – Mother to bring L. Eventually meet in Clayton Square. Mother recommends new buffet restaurant. We go there with W, A, D, Mellisa and L. Very large and busy buffet restaurant. Excellent food. We then go shopping around Liverpool and buy L some clothes for Guildford. We then watch a fashion show near St J’s shopping centre. W takes the train to Halewood with baby D. We then head off to my station. I am just in time for the 6.15pm to London. I run and catch it – just.
Mother and L travelled from Liverpool to London. Mother had wrong tickets. She left her return tickets in Birkenhead. She travelled from W’s house in Halewood. She rang me to collect her from Euston. I travelled up and met them at Euston. I bought tickets to bring them to Guildford. We went to the hotel in Godalming to check in. Afterwards we went to the Indian restaurant near the hotel.
After breakfast in my flat we went to Shere village to see the ducks and geese on the river. We took L to a playground in Shere. We then went to a trout farm. We picked out two live trout and a couple of live crayfish. We took the fish and crayfish back to my flat. We then went to Clandon park. We saw the snakes, reptiles and fish in the pet shop. Then we went round the garden centre. We then went back to Cranleigh to buy some cooking ingredients for the fish. Mother cooked the fish which was a mix of my recipe and her recipe. We played tiddly winks while we waited. Mother wanted some lager so she bought a four pack from Sainsburys and red wine for me. She drank three lagers while we had our dinner and persuaded me to drink three glasses of red wine. The fish was delicious.
We went blackberry picking and came back home. We played tiddly winks again. The winner eats ripe blackberries : the loser eats sour blackberries. I took them home at 11.30 to the hotel near my flat.
I picked them up after breakfast and we went back to my flat. I ate my Greek style breakfast which L shared with me. We played tiddly winks again and played cards.
We then went to Guildford train station where I bought Mother a Family saver card and return tickets. The next train was an hour later so we went to pizza hut for some pizzas to eat before they went. We went back to the station. I hugged L and we said our goodbyes.